Dolls? I don’t want to play with dolls, does that make me a bad mom?

Posted on Posted in Uncategorized

(Inspired by Angie, thanks!)

Yes, the age old…my kids are BORING! No, that is not an insult, but a 30 year old really has nothing in common with a 6 year old and that is good, that is the way it is supposed to be. Normal is an adult WILL get bored when playing kids games. You are normal.

So really it’s about the guilt, isn’t it? Why are you feeling guilty that you don’t want to play her doll games? Do you feel you SHOULD, you HAVE TO or are you really not spending the time and you are using dolls as an excuse? It sounds to me like you are already doing a lot of stuff with her: games, the park, outdoor stuff, that is all great. So she plays dolls and imagination games on her own…that is great too. You are not there to entertain her every second of every day, that is the problem with many of our kids today, they have been so over stimulated they have no idea how to entertain them selves.

So a couple of suggestions:
1. Take the Barbies and other dolls to the park, on a picnic or set them up to play your game with you (yes, they get a piece and a turn and everything). Play with them just like you play with your daughter. Engage her play time with your play time and see where it goes. Don’t be attached to the fact that you don’t like to play with dolls, again, an adult mind is very different from a 6 yr old mind. Don’t punish yourself because of it. Go with your strengths.

2. When your daughter asks you to play with dolls tell her that you have forgotten how to play with dolls and could she help you. I remember one time (I am like you…dolls were not my thing, probably because I grew up playing GI Joe and Lego with my cousin) my daughter asked me to play dolls. I said, what do you want me to do, she said, “oh put this on her and hold this one,” and she went about her own imaginative play. She didn’t need me to play with her, she just wanted me to sit there and to help her dress her dolls. Find out what SHE wants and don’t get caught up in what you think she wants.

3. If you really don’t want to play with dolls, then say so. Tell her that dolls are not your thing but you will play…(fill in with something else, not an excuse – perhaps offer her an option to do one of the #1 activities  suggested above). She will let you know if she wants to play something else or if she will go off and play dolls by herself. She is 6, she can make an informed decision about what she wants to play.

Simply, don’t get hung up on the small stuff. 6 is easy…my oldest just turned 16…

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